Social obligations are not prerequisites for feeling great about your appearance. You can dress up simply because looking good makes you happy. But more often than not, the situations where we put a lot of care into our outfits are big events with explicit dress codes. The best-case scenario is that we’re dressing for both reasons: because it boosts our self-esteem and because we want to look situationally appropriate. Still, knowing what is appropriate can be a head-scratcher. The dress code might be implied, and even when it’s made explicit, the jargon can be difficult to decode. Which is why we spelled it out for you here. Casual: You do not need to dress up. Sneakers, jeans and T-shirts are all acceptable, and even encouraged.
Dressy casual: You should dress up, but only a little. It’s often just a matter of wearing nicer shoes, a snazzier top or pants that aren’t blue jeans (though denim is fine with the right kind of shirt -- more on that later). Business attire: You should dress as someone might for a client-facing job. Of course, there is plenty of variation within this category. It might mean a suit, a knee-length skirt, or a blazer and khaki bottoms. But it definitely means no jeans and no sneakers. Cocktail: You should dress much nicer than you do every day. Try separates in satin, silk or velvet. Suits. When in doubt, wear black. Black tie: You should wear a very elegant dress – say, a long gown or a cocktail dress that’s on the fancier side – or a tuxedo. White tie: You should look very fancy. Tailcoats, floor-length gowns and, potentially, white gloves are all on the table. Now let’s get specific.
Jeans and a T-shirt: When the most casual of outfits is perfectly acceptable, you might as well go with it. Khakis, modest shorts, day dresses and skirts Anything cotton or linen: In the summertime especially, it’s more pleasant to wear breathable fabrics, and these can easily be dressed up or down. Basically, you want to dress like any of the characters on your favorite sitcom routinely do: in comfortable clothing that is neither ostentatious nor schlubby. Anything clearly ripped or stained: It’s a matter of self-respect more than anything, but it also shows respect for your host and fellow guests when you dress in clean clothes. Intentional distressing on denim is fine.
Uncomfortable clothing: This is always a don’t, but there’s no reason to dress outside your comfort zone when the dress code is casual. The idea is to come as you are. Dress: A shirt dress or a sweater dress can appear refined and relaxed at once. Blouse or button-down shirt: You can’t go wrong with a crisp, classic top. Add a blazer to dress the look up a notch or two. Dark denim: Unfaded indigo or black jeans can make an outfit feel instantly more evening-appropriate. “Going-out top”: These shirts – often constructed from synthetic materials and sometimes bought cheaply from fast-fashion stores – are meant to make a casual look a little more club-ready. Ultimately, a going-out top is anything that makes you feel good.
Jumpsuit: It’s a stylish one-piece alternative to the dress that can be scaled for elegance. Boiler suits in particular are very trendy this year. Don'ts Sneakers: unless they are very clean and not the type you would wear to the gym Shorts: just don't. Where Dressy Casual is Appropriate A first date Most nights out with friends (unless the dress code is explicit). Related Guide How to Take Care of Your Clothes Buying clothes built to last is one thing — but there's a lot you can do to make them endure.
Dos If business casual: khakis or dark dress pants; a button-down shirt; sport coat or blazer; tie optional. If business formal: dark suit, dress shirt and dress shoes; silk tie; sheath dress; pencil skirt. Think Kerry Washington on “Scandal,” or any of the esteemed actors on USA Network’s “Suits.” Clothing that distracts. Our fashion critic Vanessa Friedman says that “clothes should not be the focus of attention,” which means “they should not be what colleagues or friends remember after a meeting.” Anything that makes you wonder, “Is this a bad idea?” If you’re thinking it before you leave the house, your thoughts will only get louder throughout the day.
Dos Dress: You’ll want to wear a dress that is made of a refined fabric (like silk, lace or taffeta) and cuts around the knee. It should be much more formal than a sundress, but less formal than a ballgown. Most department stores and online retailers have sections devoted to party dresses, and any of those should do. Suit: Most people wear dark suits to occasions with this dress code, but if the event is a daytime party, a light suit (beige, gray) is totally fine. Dressy separates: If you wear a very snazzy top (think sequins or silk), you can probably get away with dress pants (say, velvet) or a skirt on the bottom.
Jumpsuit: Everyone wears dresses. Why not do wear something that makes a statement? Dress shoes, pumps When in doubt, wear black. When Cocktail/Semi Formal is Appropriate Some weddings Evening fundraisers Proms and other formal school events Dressing up, even once in a while, can easily become expensive. Anyone who is familiar with the marathon of weddings that begins in one’s 20s and never really ends knows that dressing up can feel like an expensive chore. You can’t really help it that you’re popular or that your friends are in love, but preparing for these celebrations and gatherings doesn’t have to break the bank.
Shop smart: Knowing where to buy occasion wear is half the battle, and not everyone’s recommendations will fit your idea of what’s affordable. The easiest and least expensive option is to browse what online retailers like Lulus and Asos have to offer. There are also fairly affordable sustainable brands like Reformation whose garments may incur a smaller carbon footprint. Second-hand and consignment stores can also have gems from high-quality labels. If you can’t find any such stores locally, the RealReal and thredUP resell clothes from luxury and midpriced brands.
Rewear your look: It can be costly to buy a new outfit for every occasion on your social calendar. If you purchase pieces that are basic enough (the simple black cocktail dress, for example) you can wear them over and over again. Tiffany Haddish has done it on the red carpet, and we all stand to learn from her eco- and budget-friendly example
Speaking of which, clothing – especially dressy clothing – should not simply be worn. It often requires alterations or D.I.Y. hacks to look as good as possible. And, crucially, garments should be cared for, especially when they are costly or beloved. Here are some things to consider:
Alterations: If you’ve purchased a piece that doesn’t fit quite like a glove, or you have a well-worn outfit that’s due for some fixes, you might want to visit a tailor or a dry cleaner who performs alterations ahead of your event. Before you just walk into the nearest shop, it’s worth asking friends for recommendations: Once the fabric is cut, it can’t really be restored. Wherever you go, make sure you drop off the garment at least three weeks before you’ll need to wear it.
Shapewear: Let’s start by saying that everyone’s body is wonderful and nothing must be done to make it look good in a dress. But, if you would like your clothes to lay smooth and flat on your person, there are plenty of things you can buy. The folks at Spanx and Commando produce seamless undergarments that are virtually undetectable underneath even the slinkiest dresses.
Tape: If after the alterations and shapewear, something about your outfit still feels precarious, there’s always good old tape. Kim Kardashian proudly uses it to secure her dresses and decolletage, and she says gaffer tape works best. There’s also fashion tape and toupee tape, which are really just two types of double-sided tape with fancy names.
Ironing and steaming: Creases can put a wrinkle in anyone’s plans to look great, so before you go out, consider ironing or steaming your outfit and putting it on a hanger so that it retains its polished appearance. Our friends at Wirecutter recommend Maytag's M400 iron for those who are in the market. Handheld steamers are a great investment, too, as they travel well and work like a charm.
Sometimes a dress code can feel rote – more like a uniform than an expression of personal style. This is especially true if you’ve built up a wardrobe of rewearable pieces and they’ve each made appearances at several occasions. Here are a few ways to make sure your outfit comes together and feels fresh:
Accessories: By this point, you’ve picked the perfect outfit. You will look great no matter what. But if you have the time and means, consider the distinguishing details. Have you thought about jewelry? What tie you’ll wear? How you’ll carry your necessities? Whether you’ll need a coat, and which one to wear? These questions are best addressed at least a week prior to the event, so you have time to shop or borrow from a friend if needed. Or maybe the answer is in your closet. If you always sport a silk tie, for example, you could try that knit one you got as a gift but haven’t worn yet.
Hair: Maybe you show up to work with wet hair every day. That’s O.K.! But you probably don’t want to do it on your best friend’s wedding day. Special occasions can present an opportunity for a haircut (at least a couple days in advance), or a hairdo (likely the day of). As long as your hair doesn’t appear visibly slept-on, greasy or otherwise unkempt, you’re doing fine.
Buying clothes built to last is one thing — but there's a lot you can do to make them endure. We polled designers and the dry cleaners they trust for tips on how to take care of our clothes. And our biggest takeaway is that first and foremost, everything we wear should be enjoyed — accessorized with a joie de vivre and not a fear of getting ruined. Here are the experts’ tips for wearing, storing and even cleaning your clothes correctly to prolong the life of your favorite items.
Menswear & Mens Designer ClothingIntimates and Swimwear Treat Your Delicates Like Delicates Araks Yeramyan, the founder of Araks, is beloved for her line’s underthings and swimsuits — which she says to wash by hand and never put in the dryer. “On a few lazy occasions, I have tried putting intimates in the machine, and the elastic is never the same.” Even while traveling, she’ll pack light and hand-wash items in the shower. Yeramyan’s method for washing delicates at home: Wash like colors together. Fill a basin with cool water and a gentle detergent (she uses Ecover delicate wash). Or in a pinch, fill the sink with water and shampoo (Dr. Bronner’s lavender soap, in her case). Swirl the laundry a few times over the course of an hour.
Gently squeeze out excess water. Dry on a drying rack. Rinse After Taking a Dip “Swimwear always needs to soak in water after every use; the saltwater or chlorine breaks down the fibers and the elastic. Your suits will last much longer if you follow this rule,” said Yeramyan. Let Everything Air Out “Everything with elastic in it should be in a rotation, especially bras. The elastic needs to relax. In general, no matter what you do, elastic has a shelf life, but the better you take care of them the longer they will last.”
Yeramyan also recommends storing lingerie with space around it, for a little breathing room. And slipping empty perfume bottles into lingerie drawers: “The idea is it leaves a little scent behind.” Tops Dress Shirts "The width of the hanger should not overpass the width of the shirt shoulders." —Anne-Marie Colban, who co-owns and operates Charvet, a shirt-making company. Anne-Marie Colban, who co-owns and operates the legendary shirtmaking company Charvet, suggests these tips for taking care of your button-down shirts: Pay Close Attention to the Insides of Collars. It’s here that stains can creep up from skin products, like lotion or makeup. Be sure to wash them immediately, especially before hanging shirts in the closet (scroll down for tips on how to remove stains).
Avoid Dryers. They will break down the fibers of the fabric and cause the garment to shrink and age prematurely. Instead, Air-Dry on Hangers. Colban prefers wooden ones. “The width of the hanger should not overpass the width of the shirt shoulders. Make sure the shoulders are well laid on the hanger and more generally, pull a little bit the fabric of the shirt to limit wrinkles (this will facilitate ironing).” When storing hangers in the closet, she suggests leaving space between them — to keep the pressed shirts smooth. Rewash Stains. “Before ironing, it is important to check that there are no more stains. If there are, wash the shirt again.” Iron With Water. Colban advocates for steam or no steam, whatever you prefer, but cautions against completely dry ironing. “It is better to iron the shirt when it is still humid. If necessary, a spray with water can make ironing more easy.” Iron in Order. The correct ironing order is: collar, cuffs and then the rest of the shirt, says Colban.
Pack Them Well. Before traveling with a dress shirt: Button the shirt completely. Put a plastic or cardboard band — the kind that come inside new shirts from the store, or from the cleaners — inside the collar (to help support the collar and maintain its shape.) With the shirt front-side down, place a sheet of paper or tissue paper on the back of the shirt before folding it (to avoid creases). Use soft cases, like these, to keep the shirts in good condition. When piling the shirts, alternate their directions. Insider Tip: Wrinkle-Free Traveling. “I travel with a small spray bottle, and then I fill it with water,” says Bruce Pask, Bergdorf Goodman’s men’s fashion director. “When I unpack, I just give the shirts a quick spritz and tug on the bottom of the hem, and then the wrinkles kind of come out naturally without needing to press it again.”
T-Shirts The designer Tony Melillo, whose eponymous line of super soft T-shirts (ATM) is beloved by T’s web editors, wears a white T-shirt almost daily. Here are his simple tips for taking care of them. Wash Gently. Melillo suggests washing T-shirts with cold water and drying on permanent press to avoid wrinkles. Also, try OxiClean. “I’m not saying it’s going to take away pit stains but I put it in everything.” Stash Carefully. Folding T-shirts keeps them fluffy. Melillo suggests folding in the sleeves toward the back, and then folding the T-shirt in half once crosswise, to avoid creating extra creases. And keeping them in a light stack on the shelf. Don’t hang your T-shirts: He says it creates unsightly hanger marks, and it stretches them — T-shirts can grow an inch just from gravity’s effect on cotton.
Pants "Clean pants twice during the summer. And then when you’re done with the season, clean them once again before you put them back into your closet." —Bruce Pask, men’s fashion director at Bergdorf Goodman, a department store that specializes in luxury goods. To avoid high-maintenance care, Bergdorf Goodman’s men’s fashion director Bruce Pask recommends being mindful of the types of pants you buy in the first place. “I’m not a fan of a linen pant,” he says, for example. “I think they’re far too wrinkle-prone and fragile.” Instead, he sticks to worsted wool pants in the summer and wool flannel in the winter, both of which you can clean at home yourself. Pask’s other low-maintenance pants rituals include: Don’t Overwash. “I think your regime is a very personal choice but I would say, depending upon how heavy the rotation, clean pants twice during the summer. And then when you’re done with the season, clean them once again before you put them back into your closet.”
Pants "Clean pants twice during the summer. And then when you’re done with the season, clean them once again before you put them back into your closet." —Bruce Pask, men’s fashion director at Bergdorf Goodman, a department store that specializes in luxury goods. To avoid high-maintenance care, Bergdorf Goodman’s men’s fashion director Bruce Pask recommends being mindful of the types of pants you buy in the first place. “I’m not a fan of a linen pant,” he says, for example. “I think they’re far too wrinkle-prone and fragile.” Instead, he sticks to worsted wool pants in the summer and wool flannel in the winter, both of which you can clean at home yourself. Pask’s other low-maintenance pants rituals include: Don’t Overwash. “I think your regime is a very personal choice but I would say, depending upon how heavy the rotation, clean pants twice during the summer. And then when you’re done with the season, clean them once again before you put them back into your closet.”
Insider Tip: Buying. Even if a pair of pants says it was prewashed, Pask cautions that a bit of shrinkage will inevitably happen in the laundry. “I make sure to give a little bit of allowance for shrinkage when I buy them.” Never Underestimate Moths. During a traumatizing moth infestation (from a European hotel, during fashion week), Pask discovered Insects Limited’s pheromone traps. “I order from them on a yearly basis and I’ll just get a set of traps and put them throughout the house just to have as a preventative measure.” For the less gung-ho, T’s market editor Angela Koh recommends stuffing drawers and closets with sachets of lavender to repel the pests and keep things smelling nice. Hang Mindfully. Instead of organizing pants by color, Pask suggests arranging them by season, keeping lighter-weight pants together on one end of the closet and heavier ones together separately — so that you can easily find what you’re looking for while getting dressed. Travel Smart. “Since I go to Italy so often for work, I bought an Italian travel iron there because no matter how good the adapters are with things like hair dryers and travel irons, the voltage variance is just never quite right and you end up blowing out the circuit of the item.” He also travels with a lint roller, and suggests a retractable option: Flint rollers are compact and keep the refillable lint sheets safe in your bag.
Prepare to Sew. “Buttons just pop. It just happens. So whenever I’m at a hotel, I always take the sewing kit and just leave it in my luggage. Don’t be above taking them home — that’s what they’re there for.” (If you prefer something with nicer thread and tools, Sweethome tested 9 sewing kits to find the best.) Denim Jeans may be the most low-maintenance pants of all. According to Daniel Corrigan, half of the design duo behind Simon Miller, “Wearing raw denim consistently and not washing them will give you a more interesting pair of jeans down the road.” But he also adds that washing won’t hurt them, and turning jeans inside out will protect the indigo hue. Similarly, don’t worry about how you store your denim, whether folded neatly in a drawer or tossed into a pile on a chair — "the great thing about denim is that it’s not delicate"— and don’t think twice about wearing it every day, or getting holes. "The knees are typically the first to get worn out, but denim looks great with ripped knees!"
The longer you wait to remove a stain, the less likely you’ll be able to remove it. —Johnny Xirouchakis, general manager of Madame Paulette, a high-end, New York City cleaner. Madame Paulette, the gold standard for New York cleaners, is a fashion-world fixture (Vogue and Anna Wintour are clients). According to the company’s general manager, Johnny Xirouchakis, “It’s been proven in studies that the longer you wait to remove a stain, the less likely you’ll be able to remove it.” And his do-it-yourself stain-removal tip couldn’t be simpler: Wet a cloth with cold water. (Avoid using paper towels so that they don’t shed on your garment and create more of a mess.) Add a drop of dish detergent to the wet cloth. (Xirouchakis suggests using “a citrus-based soap — anything that smells like lemon or orange.”) Place another cloth beneath the stain if you can.
Press on the stain, over and over, to lift it out. Resist the urge to rub, or you might damage the fabric. You can let the stain sit overnight, even in water, before putting it in the laundry. Or you can wash immediately after treating the stain. Here, Madame Paulette’s experts share how to safely remove other kinds of stains at home — on garments that can be safely cleaned with water. Follow each instruction by washing the garment as you normally would. Blood or Ink. With a cloth underneath the soiled area, re-wet the stain with ice cold water. Using a Q-Tip or small towel soaked in a cleaning solution (5 ounces water, 1 ounce ammonia, 1 ounce peroxide, 1 ounce color safe detergent) lightly tap the stain, pushing it onto the cloth underneath.
Dirt. Remove any chunks of mud carefully. Place the garment in lukewarm water and move it around to loosen and remove as much dirt as possible. Apply detergent to the stain and re-soak for half an hour; rinse and repeat. Tomato. With a butter knife or spoon, carefully pick up any excess tomato sauce. Dab detergent onto the stain and, from the underside of the garment, rinse with cold water (to push the stain out of, instead of back into, the garment). Coffee. Flush the stain with cold water. Then apply a mild cleaning solution (6 ounces water, 2 ounces color-safe detergent) until the stain comes out. If that doesn’t work, try a tougher solution (2 ounces water, 2 ounces color-safe bleach).
Jewelry "The most important thing when you buy a piece of jewelry, is to ask the salesperson how to take care of it." —Rebecca Selva, creative director at Fred Leighton, a curator of vintage jewelry. Simply put, when it comes to jewelry, “Common sense is critical,” says Fred Leighton’s creative director, Rebecca Selva. She elaborates: Swimming or Exercising? Take It Off! “Diamonds, you know, are the hardest gemstone. They certainly can be worn and enjoyed every day. However, they are a gemstone that can chip." So take them off when you might knock the band into other metals, such as while lifting weights — or even packing up to move. And especially in the water. “A ring can loosen on your hand — and try finding it in the ocean." Ask for Advice When You Buy. “The most important thing when you buy a piece of jewelry, is to ask the salesperson how to take care of it." Don’t Fix It Yourself. Ditch the do-it-yourself mentality when it comes to jewelry. “You can actually damage it more by trying to repair something,” Selva says. But before taking it in to the professionals, put broken jewelry in a Ziploc bag — so that you don’t lose any gemstones, pearls or metal pieces en route to have the item repaired. “Or if a strand of pearl breaks, tape the ends or tie a knot if you can — make sure those ends are somehow sealed.”
Keep Things Organized … and Cool. “Diamonds can scratch other diamonds and diamonds can scratch other gemstones, so keep them separate.” Some stones are vulnerable to heat — like opals, turquoise and coral — so don’t keep them somewhere warm or in direct sunlight. It will affect their coloring. Don’t Scrub Too Hard. Selva recommends soaking most jewelry in lukewarm, sudsy water (or water with lemon), to loosen up the grime, and then very gently cleaning with a soft brush. Remember, a ring gets the least dirty on top of a stone. It’s the underside that gets the dirtiest because that’s the part that touches the natural oils and lotions on your skin. Avoid hot or cold water (radical temperature changes can affect gemstones) and soaking porous gemstones (turquoise, pearls, opals). And don’t forget to close the drain! Handbags Have you ever bought a new leather handbag or briefcase that came in a cotton drawstring pouch? That pouch is called a dust bag — it’s not just fancy packaging. “They help isolate your bag from dust and touching items that may discolor or damage your bag,” says Jed Winokur, Coach’s archive director. He says that regularly storing handbags inside them at home is one of two ways to prevent damage. Here are his other tips:
Keep handbags stuffed “to help retain their shape.” Acid-free tissue paper (preferably unbuffered) is best; newspaper can cause discoloration and damage over time. Winokur suggests wrapping metal hardware with tissue as well, to safeguard against marks on the leather.
"In order to keep them in premium condition, dress shoes should not be worn for consecutive days." —Paula Gerbase, artistic director of John Lobb, which specializes in luxurious men’s shoes. Because there are so many kinds of shoes, we polled four different experts on the proper care of your shoes: Paula Gerbase, artistic director, John Lobb (bespoke and luxurious men’s shoes) Tull Price, founder, Feit (handmade leather footwear) Percy Steinhart, president and creative director, Stubbs & Wootton (fashionable slippers) David Mesquita, vice president, Leather Spa (a repair service with high-end clientele) And they had shockingly similar advice: Use Shoe Horns. “They are indispensable for keeping the shape of the shoe,” Steinhart says. Gerbase adds that the simple little tool “ensures that the backs of the shoes are kept intact.”
